Tuesday, September 30, 2008


Just how do you think im feeling right now having to read 400 odd pages of this book ADAA GOAN [a village divided] when the whole atmosphere is that of celebration. the countdown has begun, 4 more days to go and then panchami dawns heralding Durga pujas. and for this silly silly classmate of mine, who asked this really nerdy and unpredictable teacher when she would take a test and that she better take it before the pujas or she may have problems. and guess what? that moron actually gave us a test that too on Friday the 3rd, just one day before the puja starts. now i have to salvage 400 odd pages of utter rubbish of which i cant make head or tail. damn! all i want to do is to set back and see the celebrations and take in the whole ambiance.

This is my last pujas here. next year i may not even make it home, and such a thing really dampens my spirit. the best thing is clouds is coming home and i hope to catch up with her. somehow i have arranged a meet with old school pals that too is coming up. i have to go over to samik's place to meet his jiju who is coming to visit, now that is an occasion I'm feeling a little scared of but i think with samik and didi around we will manage just fine. and there is a night out with samik of course to go pandal hopping with his friends. aahh! i hope this pujas are most memorable but to enjoy pujas i need give this dreadful test! might as well get it done and over with! but you guys beware of such hidden worms in class or work place, who bring on more not only on themselves but on others, much more than they themselves can manage! god!

Monday, September 29, 2008


Ive been tagged by aqua girl and trust me this is hilarious..

Just type your name and then write needs and google it :P
eg:- raka needs

1.Raka is a male, strong, healthy, faithful and loving Rhodesian ridgeback who needs a caring home. He was born on December 3, 2006 and grew up with cats and two border collies.Raka has proven to be an extremely protective and loyal dog
WTF!! :x me and a dog?and that too a male one! yewww!!!

2.raka needs to be read kapparu(k)kha
huh?!! what?

3.If a raka was joined after ruku', then the entire raka needs to be repeated after the prayer.
omg what is this?

Raka needs a designer
olala yeah sure anytime :P

5.Raka needs to be carefully controlled to avoid the dangerous effects of its unchecked outpouring

now i tag-
& PJ

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Forces angry over pay

While we sit with friends in a plush cafe with friends or dining with family in posh restaurant; do we spare a thought for those who ensure that we are safe and have the luxury of being with our loved ones? we dont, we think of them only when there is a crisis. armed forces are ever present on duty 24*7 but how do we pay our respects? by putting in a 6th pay commission where a Colonel who becomes a Major General in 10 years of time gets paid which is still lower than that of a police head [a civilian]

This is disgraceful! Is this how we treat the armed forces who leave family homes loved ones behind just so that we are protected and secure?And just what benefits do we give them in return? Not enough to ensure that their children and family have a steady life? and what about the life risk or the risk of being physically handicapped in wars? wars usually last for a specific period of time but our armed forces are on the frontiers for 15-20 years now in any kind of weather conditions. and yet we choose not to give them their due and blame it on inflation when bureaucrats are easily getting their hike, when they can afford to go without it. and our jawans are sweating it out in our borders.

It is a sad day in Indian history!

Saturday, September 27, 2008


I've been tagged by aneesh.

1. Name five of your all time favourite movies.
  • jab we met
  • rock on
  • hum dil de chuke sanam
  • kaho na pyaar hai [im still crushing over Hrithik..watched the movie over 200 times]
  • kal ho na ho
in english [ i know i was supposed to give just 5 but i thought i ll give 5 english and 5 hindi :D ]

  • pretty woman
  • titanic
  • narnia
  • autumn in new york
  • troy
2. Name one movie which you recommend as a "must see".
Jab We Met, if you love romantic movies as much as i do, its a must watch.

3. one and only one movie that you have seen many times.[watching on TV wont count
it has to be kaho na pyaar hai and jab we met [2 times each]

4.which movie comes to your mind when i say funniest?
choddobeshi [uttam kumar and madhabi mukherjee]

5.which movie made you really emotional?
this one goes to KAL HO NA HO.. CRIED BUCKETS :P

6.which movie series was as interesting as the first part?
hmm dhoom2???

7.which movie didnt, according to you, live up to your expectations?
15 park avenue

8.which movie surprised you?

now i tag
Priya [PJ]

Friday, September 26, 2008


This topic has been in the news for all the wrong reasons. firstly the West Bengal government usurped the agricultural land from the peasants and sold it at a higher price to the Tata's for the Nano plant. the poor farmers were given 1/10 of what they should have been paid. others who were reluctant to give up their land where brutally killed, their children raped or burnt alive.

A year and half later when the uproar and protests died down and the plant was somewhat put up.and now Miss Mamata Banerjee is up to antics again,just when the government has agreed to make amends. she makes tall demands which is very hard to fulfill.

I am not political.I am not supporting the CPM because what they did with the farmers was wrong.Im not supporting the TMC either because what they are doing now is wrong too. tit for tat is not the right way to resolve problems. the opposition did a great job in helping the voices of millions of farmers being heard over the din but what she is doing now is for votes. everyone is in it for their own benifit. the government has already had their share of the perks from the Tatas that they are afraid to show the contract that they had with them. Tatas too have got their publicity, which has resulted in their being invited to other states, and many other things that id rather not mention here.

People say India consists of 60% agricultural land and agriculture is our main source of economy.id say, why not tip the ratio to 50-50% where 50% will be for industry and 50% for agriculture. they say poor farmers what will they do without land?i say forcefully educate them,at least some will have jobs as clerks or henchmen. and what about the youth in the urban centers???who slog and tire to get into the best of the institutions, forget the money spent behind their education; in hope for getting plush jobs. will this Singur issue benifit them??? all major companies are backing out. and we will then be compelled to leave our land and move elsewhere to earn our living. and then it will be our parents who are now all so flared up for/against this Singur issue; will proclaim that our children and our youth care less for their parents and for their selfish motives [for enhancement of their career] they are moving out. how do we survive here when there are no opportunities? what do we do for survival? instead of doing tit for tat.people,the government should realize what can be done now to rectify the mistake as much as possible. so that the farmers and the youth will thrive in mutual harmony. but both the government and the anti-system are egoistic people they look for how things will benifit themselves and not what happens to the future citizens of the state. and our elders caught between the ego tussle of two major political agencies, think only of what is in the present and not the future in which their own children will be left to fend for themselves.It is a sad fate of Kolkata, which was in 1800 to early 1900 the capital of colonial India, and the center for everything thriving and developing.

We, the youth now must suffer for all that our predecessors have done.it is the will of fate!

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Why do we still care when we know perfectly well that, for that person you dont matter at all?

why does it hurt when i knew this would happen?



Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Comfort Thought

What is comfort thought? heard of comfort food but not of comfort thought??? well, whenever we are angry,depressed, unhappy etc.. we always resort to some thought consciously or not.

I have two comfort thought, one is wanting to pack my bags and go somewhere where no-one knows me, where i can begin again. and the second one is, wanting to sit solitary on a rock with waves caressing my feet. i don't know why but these thoughts keep playing in my mind every time i'm down...

Tell me what comforts you when everything in life seems so low and dull?


Every individual has their own space and it is the space that has to be respected in order for a healthy relationship or atmosphere. wondering why my sudden obsession with space? well i got into an argument with mom and that reemphasized just how important space is in our lives.

When a child is being born there he/she should be nurtured and guided but once the child crosses his/her teens she should be trusted enough to make the right choices if required she can be suggested on the things she is doing, but not directly taking over his/her life and their making decisions. india it is not uncommon to hear parents exclaim "for me no matter how old you are, you will remain my baby to me" this may sound soo endearing to most but has a negative impact otherwise. once a child grows up, she should be given her space to be who she/he wants to be and what she wants to do. it is this lack of space, that often leads to the elders disrespecting the young adults that leads to so much strife within the family.

Now you will tell me why should elders respect their children? well respect is not something you demand but your attitude should be such that your personality should command respect. if we all respect one another, irrespective of age, then live is much smoother. being elders or parents it is difficult for them to appreciate or understand the youth because of their different ways, so instead that go about trying to change them. but instead if they respected the younger generation for who and what they are then things would have been much easier. it is applicable to youth respecting the elders too. if there is mutual respect and scope of space then this so called generation gap would not exist.

And this is not just applicable to parent-child relationship but to friendships, marriages and relationships too.i hope people are able to accept and appreciate each owns' want of space and respect them for everything that they are and everything that they are not.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Indiblogger-kolkata bloggers meet

thats the indiblogger tee
during the debate,yup thats samik on the extreme left

during the presentation

thats two of the member of the indiblogger team

the one on the right is BG *blush* *blush*

Yesterdays blogger meet was one of its kind. this is the first time i have been to one and the first of its kind to be held too. BG,ANOOP,SANDHYA AND RENE-the blogger team was present. it was one helluva gathering. we had an animated discussion about blogger ethics and had a wonderful interactive session where we spoke about our blog and why we blog. i met quite a few people and made friends..i just have to add that BG is damn cute with his trademark sense of humour. we all felt welcomed and comfortable and thanks to INDIBLOGGER for making this meet such a grand success. we require enterprising people like you who are not just concerned about making a career but also who are inclined in making a difference!kudos!

PS-s0rry the lights were dim so couldnt get better pictures.but more pictures in flikr by the indiblogger team.

Sunday, September 21, 2008


Vishwakarma puja just ended. he is known as the god of industry, factories and machines. kite flying is a must during this time in kolkata, the blue skies of sarat is spotted will multicoloured kites which flutter with delight competing with one another. with Vishwakarma puja, durga pujo is heralded. you must see the bongs getting all geared up to do their last minute shopping. the pandals are almost done.... the idols will be brought in the mandap and then the completion of the idol and the pandals can come about. the regional news channels are all about which locality is doing what, to win the coveted awards for this years pujas. i guess even West Bengal police are waking up to manage the ocean of people who stream in the streets from the very advent of pujas from panchami itself, so one can imagine the festive mood that is rendering most incapable to get any work done. i wonder how i am supposed to study for my upcoming tests when celebrations are all around :( but i sure want to get it done and over with so that im not haunted to study during those 5 days of pujas :D

In about 7 days we have mahalaya...and then in another 7 days the festivities will start..i just cant wait for the pujas to start, for the first time in ages we will have a friends meet, all my class mates from school are somewhat notifies...i hope most of them turn out and we can have a blast. I'm supposed to stay out one night with samik and friends, so it just indicated some more masti.i just hope that during this festivitiy nothing untoward happens, because kolkata houses many and plays host to some more during the pujas. i hope we all have a safe and happy pujas ahead.

Will surely post pictures later :) look out for them...

Friday, September 19, 2008

A walk down memory lane

No I am not going to dust the dirt off my memories, or awaken my conscience which can never deny your existence. Not I am not going to linger to relish the moments we had shared. To be honest, time and love have already started to erode my memories, what remains is snippets of what was and what I will never let it be. Yes it belongs to the past and that is where it is destined and willed to be.

You will ask what the purpose of writing this is. And I’m silent. I know not what to tell you. No I’m not in love with you. Yes I am happy in my life now and I’m looking forward to my future. I guess I am just trying to make peace with something that marked a change in my life; forever.

I don’t know where you are now. I have almost forgotten your face. But I still battle with the memories which are no longer a source of pleasure but a reminder of something I would never like to remember. Sometimes when I walk past your old house, my mind drifts to you but in an instant that too is forgotten. I keep coming across things that remind me of you. I should cringe in remembrance but I don’t. I wonder how I could change thus, that nothing related to you affects me anymore, no fear or nostalgic grips me. But I can’t do away with you completely I try but I can’t. Why? No I have no hangover of what was, I don’t want to recreate the past. I am happy in my present but past comes back now and then to remind me that were there, that it had all happened you were there. It is not just my imagination.

Years have passed. I hope you have moved on. I want you to know I am happy and in love. I have a happy tomorrow waiting for me, when the person I love the most awaits me for the rest of my life. I want you to be happy too, in whatever you do. I want you to move on beyond the shadows of the past. I hope you will rise above the guilty feeling of pushing me away from you. I have forgiven you, but I can never come back. I hold you in the highest regard, and I wish you the world of happiness. Heed to my request and walk away from the past; which will give you nothing but grief and unhappiness. Accept that what happened can never be altered. Embrace reality, hold my hand in friendship and let me guide you to the golden sunrise, from where a new life will begin with a new tomorrow. Time has not run out, if only you make an effort. I will be there, like I have been always, as a friend always there in need, trust me. Let not your past mar the future you can build and the happiness that can be all yours if only you reach out.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

A New Beginning

Wondering why i was suddenly consumed by this immense need to change my blog URL which has been my blog address since my formative days as a blogger?? well i felt a need for anonymity and a sense of security. over the period of time, i have noticed that my blog has been subjected to as a device by which people i know personally [my friends, family,relatives and some people i don't get along with at all] to pry into my private realm of my life and use the information for their own selfish needs. Samik looks in to see the things that are occurring in my life,which he suspects i may not tell him, my college mates pry to see what exactly i write if i bitch about them at all; so on and forth.

i still maintain that i blog to preserve my sanity. my blog is my best friend. and my friends in blogger ville are the people who matter the most once i enter this virtual world. they still find immense relevance once i step out too. but surely my blog isn't for those who seek voyeuristic pleasure from it. i am a simple and uncomplicated person. i am just plain and very ordinary. but i am me. and i have the right to write what i feel like and opine what my sensibilities allow me. what i write is not to please people but it is solely to satisfy my mind and my soul. and i need the independence to speak my mind and write on issues i find relevant.i don't want to cater to what people opine and write accordingly. i may sound like a selfish moron here but then sometimes one does have to think about ones own need.

i hope our association as friends will continue and in this leg of my journey in blogger i hope to make new friends who will value me for everything i am and everything i am not! cheerio

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Friend and Stranger

In the last 24 hours i have been hurt twice. it is not hurt as in tears and sadness...but a part of me felt wounded. for one, is one of my closest friend and the other is a girl i admire in class[ i don't share a friendship with her though] both in their attitude towards me have really made me feel that, people don't need a reason to be mean, and they care less how their attitude may hurt other people.

lets take my friend. well what she could have politely refused me, she chose instead of humiliating and insulting me, insinuating that i lack in morals and degraded me. it was not required. i simple "no" would have worked too. what good does it do to people to look down upon people on issues which they themselves can be tarnished. but hey! im not saying a thing, because it is not an appropriate thing to do. i hope it does her good that she being a close friend has hurt me.

now for this stranger. well, she is one of the most sorted girls i had come across. we have never been friends and now maybe never will be. i admired her for all that she stood up for; and thought her to be a genuine person. the other day, i thought we connected well, as we spoke on some issues; and for once i felt it doesn't need a friend to have a good conversation, i think i liked her even more. but no! she too turned out to be like the rest, who mocked me because of the fact, that we had a conversation when she clearly didn't want to participate in it and wanted to be left alone; contrarily i remember distinctly that i had asked her if i should indeed leave her alone but she said it was fine and she in fact asked me various questions, gave me her views... how can people be so dual? why cant they be transparent in what they do and want?

If i don't want a thing or a person i make no bones about it. i don't know what is happening to people. probably this is how people are, they lash out at others and not resolve things politely and others use politeness to fend off people and then bitch about them... some people.....
21/09/2008 at 16:00
Kolkata Blogger Meet
there is a blogger meet organized by indiblogger...all my blogger mates from kolkata please try and be there..the meeting is sure to rock!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008


Being away from my blog is such a pain and not surprisingly all kinds of problem occur only with me so you can well imagine.. yes first person to be blamed is my internet. My service provider has now changed, actually the organization from whom I would take my package has now split into two groups, so now the wires and everything else has to be changed and new connection has to be established. Phew!

I donated blood on Sunday. What went wrong was I had woken up with a headache and a somewhat sore throat, but nonetheless I went. This time blood donation was somewhat smooth, no needle hassles like other times; when the doc isn’t able to find my vein, so he screwed the needle into my skin in search of that vein. Ouch! Guess what? I was the only girl and the youngst person to donate blood. Samik of course wasn’t too happy when he heard about it, but then I told him once I was back home and resting. Lol! Seriously I haven’t felt that weak in ages, I could barely sit straight. But still I went shopping in crowded markets J

Seeing the live coverage and report of the dehi blasts left me shattered. To seee canaught place, greater kailash and karol bagh being the victims of terrorism not only affected me, but to see the places with whom I have such fond memories, which stood for all things special to me being reduced to shambles brought tears to me eye. Samik and I both couldn’t get over the fact, that just 9 months back we were at the same place, having the time of our lives. I really hope the government will take strict action against terrorism, to ensure its citizens a happy and secure life.

I have a test coming up but im just too sick for words. This cold is killing me. I have just no clue what I am going to do. But I guess I will try and make use of the time in bed to relax and catch up with studies. Hopefully things work out. The first of my first internal results are out, they are pretty good, atleast I am happy. I got a 7 out of 10, the heighest being 8. I am putting in efforts I hope I am being rewarded.

Samik is serving his notice period in HSBC. He will get his release by November 8th if it is not extended till maybe the end of the month. So spending the pujas is so not happening. But then we can spend the morning anjalis together, or so I hope. We have made some plans to enjoy ourselves before samik leaves. It is a big step. A Shantiniketan [ a place, where Rabindranath tagore opened his esteemed institutions. My mom is a pass out of it.] trip being planned with friends, I hope I can convince a few girl friends of mine to come along only then this trip will become a reality. And if it does, then it sure promises some good times ahead before the dreaded reality will step in.

Friday, September 12, 2008

some people make special places in our hearts.
when they move on their place is left vacant. and a void is created.
a void that can never be filled.

sometimes it is just best to let things go;
for what was never meant to be will remain unfulfilled.
maybe it was never meant to be at all.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

The process of separation has already begun. Nothing will defer it anymore. The heart is both happy and sad. Happy because it means, new shores beckons him to a better tomorrow. Sadness permeates when the realization dawn, that the countdown has begun; soon it will be time for him to leave. People say, it is normal, you will get used to it; but for those who live the reality know, just how distressing it is. Insecurities threaten to over power but better sensibilities prevail. Heart shatters into million pieces each time the topic comes up, the very existence is disturbed; yet smile never abandons my face, nor does optimism desert me. Tears threaten to spill, but do not. Mind is numb. How long? How long before I break down? Consequences will be disastrous. So tears and gloom will have to be masqueraded in smiles. Every passing moment have to be treasured and memorized. Life has to be lived, like there is no tomorrow. For tomorrow I may be alone, with memories for comfort. Let’s make the best of a these moments, before time runs out.

Monday, September 08, 2008

He loves her
But he cannot overlook the shortcomings

He is said to be a genuine person
Yet he is not without fangs and conceit.

Can such contradictions occur simultaneously?
Can this really be love??

Sunday, September 07, 2008

Turning 21

Turning 21 isnt anything special but it is the people around and their anticipation for a day meant to be just for me, made it more special. i had everyone i loved and valued and that mattered the most. i was truly happy, despite the several urges to sulk or give in to the gloom. it meant much, for next year i may just have to be on my own on my birthday. thanks to Ipsy, Druhin, Didi, Jiju, Roshni and specially Samik for making it so special.

Saturday, September 06, 2008


watched Rock On yesterday, and i was too spellbound to think coherently. it was every cine goers paisa vassol and a technicians delight and youths moral booster and every individuals deepest desire come true. if you value friendship, this is the movie too watch. music is superb. farhan akhtar and prachi desai play their part to perfection as new comers, purab and luke kenney fit into their part and arjun rampal looked every bit of a rock star. the debutant director marks a great entry into bollywood. it is THE movie to watch. ROCK ON!

Friday, September 05, 2008

Tag 2 & 3

hey people, all of you who thought i was dead and gone for good, bad luck!I'm back... my Internet package as usual conked off because i had exhausted my download limit[ i don't download a thing :( must be the blogs with songs and stuff..hmmmph!] anyway, pardon me ill be more frequent will read up your blogs and comment ASAP. I'm just thrilled to do this tag, actually any tag, right now. not because i don't have posts up my sleeve, i do; but then i m happy so i want to write on happy stuff. why happy? well because i turn 21 soon, very soon! :)

here goes the tag: This tag asks the concerned person to write 6 quirks about herself. and i have been tagged by vanilla sky :)

  • i have a very good instinct, i almost always know what is going to happen, my opinions about people is rarely wrong, and most my decisions are correct.
  • I'm scared of being mugged, molested or even eve teased, so until I'm out only with samik [who drops me home] I'm never out till late.
  • i meticulously make lists and plan out my day to day activities, my accounts exams and other events. and i almost never forget any birthdays.
  • the only time i am myself is at night when everyone is asleep, it is then i become more humane and i finally let tears, fears and insecurities crawl out. even though im a emotional person i feel ashamed to show them.
  • I'm scared of loving and losing people, so i try and scare them off me if possible. and if it is a guy,any guy [potential mate]i almost always make him a brother, so as not to have him propose to me and me having to deny him.
  • love, marriage and making love [sex] to me is sacred, i will only give myself up to a man i can trust, respect and depend on. i am capable of walking away from a relationship if only i feel i do not respect the person or trust him.

Tag 3

i have been tagged by ๑۩۞۩๑♥V♥๑۩۞۩๑

you need to post your desktop and few of your favorite quotes.

this is my desktop: that's samik and me

1. Our doubts are traitors, it often makes us loose what we could have achieved by fearing to attempt- Shakespeare

2.It is better to be loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

3.Our wills and fate, do so contrary run.that our devices are still overthrown; our thoughts are ours, their end none of our own.

now i tag- Aneesh ,Matangi Mawley,aqua gurl, Vinz aka Vinu, Ria

Wednesday, September 03, 2008


tag 1 and this is by aqua girl.thanks sweety :D

I am - simple, straightforward, taditional yet i have modern outlook to life.

I hate - hate is too strong a word to use, noone is that important to me that i absolutely hate him/her. lol!

I hear - snow patrol "chasing cars"

I sing- must have been love- roxette / where do i begin-love story theme.

I cry- when i fail.

I write- to preserve my sanity

I always- am on time.

I dont always- express my mind

I listen- to soft pop

I can usually be found- in my classroom, library or at home in my room.

I am happy about- my life

now for the time tagging, i tag vanilla sky, [-v], buzz, and mayank
Yay! Vishal won!!

The most deserving of the two guys won. Vishal not only won over the one girl who had been true to him even under the grills of a reality show, but he won the contest too and has come out of the battleground of so called dating program, untarnished and as a man who knows what he is doing and has proved that being unscrupulous can only bring doom and nothing but.