Tuesday, September 23, 2008


Every individual has their own space and it is the space that has to be respected in order for a healthy relationship or atmosphere. wondering why my sudden obsession with space? well i got into an argument with mom and that reemphasized just how important space is in our lives.

When a child is being born there he/she should be nurtured and guided but once the child crosses his/her teens she should be trusted enough to make the right choices if required she can be suggested on the things she is doing, but not directly taking over his/her life and their making decisions. india it is not uncommon to hear parents exclaim "for me no matter how old you are, you will remain my baby to me" this may sound soo endearing to most but has a negative impact otherwise. once a child grows up, she should be given her space to be who she/he wants to be and what she wants to do. it is this lack of space, that often leads to the elders disrespecting the young adults that leads to so much strife within the family.

Now you will tell me why should elders respect their children? well respect is not something you demand but your attitude should be such that your personality should command respect. if we all respect one another, irrespective of age, then live is much smoother. being elders or parents it is difficult for them to appreciate or understand the youth because of their different ways, so instead that go about trying to change them. but instead if they respected the younger generation for who and what they are then things would have been much easier. it is applicable to youth respecting the elders too. if there is mutual respect and scope of space then this so called generation gap would not exist.

And this is not just applicable to parent-child relationship but to friendships, marriages and relationships too.i hope people are able to accept and appreciate each owns' want of space and respect them for everything that they are and everything that they are not.


Keshi said...

Very well-said!

Personal SPACE is imp in any r'ship...and some ppl never realise that. And they can be nosy, affectionate, close etc to a suffocating level!


mayz said...

cudnt agree wid u more...space without doubt is one of d most imp things in anny relationship

phoenix said...

@keshi and mays
:D its sad the people in india where relationships are so close knit, people donot recognize the need for space. in this case at least we can borrow from the west.

peter said...

ahh sure I agree !!
but the fact is that most of the ppl generally dun understand :(

Vinz aka Vinu said...

those who realize this, succeeds in maintaining any relationship...

one thing we all need to understand is we all are individuals with their own personal choices and opinions..!! we need to respect that...!!

well written girl..!!

phoenix said...

i know we need to understand that ourselves and only then we can set an example for others to follow

thanks :)

vanilla sky said...

talking about the parent-child r'ship, its absolutely necessary that parents should respect their offspring as individual and not look upon as just their daughter/son
but there are certain instances in life , where they can definitely guide us , and its in those cases whr we shud nt smirk off thinking that we r being denied space

Priya Joyce said...

that was a very nice article dear
hey simply liked it.

I think this comes from insecurity.
people want to have their loved ones forever and always wth them.
its all psychological actually.
nice point raised out there .

phoenix said...

@vanilla sky
thats true...we need their guidance too :)

hmm now thats food for thought

Keshi said...

I agree..many Desis and Sri Lankans dunno what SPACE means. Even parents...cos they force their kids to do certain things in life that they dun wanna.