Thursday, December 25, 2008

A dull christmas


Christmas has never been so dull. It has always been a grand event for me. Convent schooling for almost 15 years does that to you .in my childhood the excitement of getting up to a bag filled with goodies, thrilled me to no end. Stockings were hanged the night before, Christmas tree was decorated and Santa stood by it; id drift off to sleep as my room glowed in the beautiful lights that dad would help me put up.


School used to be so much fun too. We’d prepare a month in advance and on the day school wrapped up for the winter holidays we would have our winter play. Carol singing, Mary and Joseph and the birth of Christ were so beautifully depicted in the play. We would end the play with Santa coming in with the goodies. It used to be so much fun to sing these carols and munching in the yummy cookies, cakes and tarts and our Sister [Irish nun our principal] would deliver one of her beautiful speeches and we’d all sing joy to the world and school would finally end on a happy note, with promises to meet the next year. Sigh!


No stockings greeted me this morning, no Christmas tree and surely no hint of celebrations, I peeked from beneath my blanket and reminded myself, that indeed it was Christmas the difference was I had in fact grown up. Until last year I had dropped not so subtle hints reminding my folks that the stockings would still be up. But this year I had no heart and surely not the usual excitement. It was a dull Christmas with no joy or merriment, and to top it off I was in a really bitter mood and was sulking throughout. All I did was stay in bed, read my book and occasionally stare aimlessly stare out if the window. It was a dreadful feeling of being lonesome. I had everyone I valued but I felt I was so alone as if I had just lost something important, maybe it was my childlike innocence, but I can’t be too sure. I guess I have grown up and the monotony of life has hit me. Maybe grown ups are not entitled to have the fun and excitement that the children experience.

16 comments:

mayz said...

its all in d mind my dear...its all in d mind

CяystąL said...

My Christmas ws very much this same..but as Mayz said..the spirit ought to be in the mind..thts enough! :)
"Meeryy" X'mas!

Richa said...

i can soo understand the merryness of christmas buddy..

since i left the convent, my christmases have been dull too.. but nevertheless, the faith stays :)

hugz!!

yamini meduri said...

MERRY CHRISTMAS...!!!

but to me this christmas is the best day of my entire life...i had a great time with the special care children with whom we celebrated today...!!! had a great time. will post about the day very soon...!!!

MultiMenon said...

Kno something?Ur prolly right..Its a sign of a grown up gal wid no more of the convent skool enviro tht used to be the case earlier around.About being alone,I wud rather differ.I fight the loneliness in my life sharing them to all you ppl in the blogosphere..

Dun feel bad..Get to believe tht als gonna be fine.Optimism helps,tho I seldom am optimistic.Even then,it does help..

take care..
cheer up now.. :)

little boxes said...

its not about the day,its about the spirit.
believe me,if today's been blue for you...there will soon be days of mirth.
because you know what?that old guy in red and white has his own way of making us believe he exists even when we know who filled in our stockings :)

ANWESA said...

i too have a similar story to tell.
we had annual function in skul just b4 christmas n it was real fun,now its just a holide.but i took out a toy santa 4m my cupboard n have hung him in the room.dats my x-mas this yr.

Ria said...

hmm rite!i feel so too, Christmas is so much fun when one is a child. :( Miss my childhood!!

Trinaa said...

Christmas used to be fun in school...ab toh bas tv par hi dekhne ko milta hai :(

Hemanth Potluri said...

:(...u reminded of those wonderful days we used have all the fun :(....miss my childhood.:)....

urs..hemu..

Harshita said...

So what if no one have u the Christmas Spirit around you... go grab it when you need it :)

Make urself happy...dont wait for someone else to do tht for u...

Ah! am not being preachy...just want you to know that you are a great person and u r the best when u are happy :)

A warm hug!

pisku said...

Know what u mean.I had a similar feeling in deepavali this year.
Nice blog. linked u up

Akshat said...

No..I guess you just think you are to grown up for Christmas....but as a matter of fact...the spirit is all that counts....

P.S..Is this a wrong time to say that I had a blast?? :P :P

vanilla sky said...

Hey , cheer up :)

Priya Joyce said...

somewatt same here never mind ...hope to celebrate it better nxt tym

:)
:)

Phoenix said...

@those who had a blast
im so glad someone had fun!! :)

@those like me who didnt
never mind there is always a next time

@those who had similiar experience at school
*same pinch*

@everyone
lol im too tired to individually comment..do forgive me...