Sunday, December 28, 2008

This year that was

The night before a New Year dawns is something very sentimental and teary to me, I don’t know why, maybe after yet another year of struggle there are apprehensions and hopes of just how the next year would turn out to be.

This year when first woke up, something in the air told me ‘this would be my year’. With the year almost coming to an end I know otherwise. Contrary to what I had hoped this year like others was a roller coaster. Nothing went ‘my’ way and it actually went where I didn’t want it to go. 4th semester results were bad and all because I refused to give my all to Tamil, a compulsory paper in our syllabus. Other cheated and studied and sneaked their way past a surprising good result for the first time, and I was there shocked at my results and to see my hard work go to waste, it was a huge setback but then somehow I battled it out. Slowly I retreated into my shell and stove to work harder.

The best that happened to me was my Vizaq trip that I went with my college. I didn’t have friends, people I had purposely severed from myself. There was this one time friend of mine who was there in the group and I was even apprehensive to go for the trip. Agreeing to the trip was the wisest thing I did. During the trip my friend and I finally buried the hatchet and talked out our differences. Amidst tears of regret and pain of longing for a year of separation my best friend from college and I were back to being the good friends that we once were and this time we swore that we would learn from our mistakes. We have braved a few hurdles now and then and we seem to be doing fine. [Touchwood] otherwise too the trip enabled me to visit a very beautiful place, somewhere I found the inner peace I had been looking for. The waves breaking on the beach of Vizaq calmed the inner turmoil I was battling then. And the break was refreshing.

I lost a great friend whom I had patched up with, after finding out ‘its’ true colors. Regrets? Yeah a little maybe. A beautiful thing that I created I saw wilting before me, it was one of the most jarring effects in my life and led me to contemplate a lot of things in life. I found a beautiful angel on blogger; Harshi; and finding her was a revelation; she helped me evolve over the time and made me a better person. Richa is like an addiction now, I cant pass a day without talking to her. Divs too was a great friend to have and I sincerely hope she hasn’t left us and she comes back soon. PJ has now become like this cute little sister to me, and is quite precious, then there is my newest friend Anwesa whom I’m getting to know and with the looks of it, we are about to hit it off real well. So blog world was an ultimate retreat and a source of pleasure.

My personal life is nothing worth talking about, for it wasn’t really bright but with the optimism that Harshi instilled in me I think I could make the best of a rotten situation. I found courage to fight back despair and let hope reign and I hope things work out on personal front, for carrying on this charade can be quite a burden.

So predictions for the next year? To be honest, I think next year will be more rotten than this year, I foresee a dip in finances, and loads of difficulties and disappointments coming my way. But now I’m somewhat prepared to deal with whatever comes my way. I know its worth all the pain because at the end of it I learn something. I can try my best rest is up to what is planned for me.

I hope you guys had a great year and here’s hoping that the New Year brings you prosperity, happiness and many things more.

Stay happy and keep smiling

Love Phoenix

16 comments:

Richa said...

awww...

i m in love with u now even more..
i too have a scheduled post similar comin up on new yrs eve :D

happy new yr to u too..


love n hugz!!

ANWESA said...

u kno this post of yours really brought home one point-we must keep learning.no experience is pain,its a teacher.i cherish this all my life.

Comfortably Numb said...

Great year? Not really.
But then looking forward as always.

Cheers!!

pisku said...

And what it also will give u is the courage to take things as it comes. Get past this, and soon you shall be screaming, "life is calling".

ceedy said...

*To be honest, I think next year will be more rotten than this year,*

Now being practical if I said hope you wish is granted - will you call me a devil :P

yamini meduri said...

happy new year dear....!!!

start the new year with all those smiles that were away from you this year.....and wish you a great year ahead..

to me the year 2008 was a mixed one. there were times when i was on the top of the world and also when i was supressed down and also when i was into depression .....

i expereinced everything that somene like me can...but i hope the year ahead to be beautiful and to my land of dreams...it should be a great year with all you pals...!!!

keep smiling..!!!

Hemanth Potluri said...

something good to know abt :)...u had got so many good friends :)...its all good to know the feeling of u sweetu :)...i to hope divs comes backs :)...

urs..hemu..

Harshita said...

I don't deserve so much space in ur posts...really!

Its YOU who has changed ur life for better and all these are your efforts.

I am optimistic for you and all of us... Things will be better than what they are now in the coming year.

Thanks for giving me so much space in your life as well as ur blog.

I am honored. Wish you lots of love and luck.

Mithe said...

Really really nice post Phoenix.What a summary-you provided us great insights into your life-loved reading it!
You have been awarded yet again! for details-visit my blog...:)

Priya Joyce said...

buuutifully recollected re

I juss adore this post dear..luv it...

regrets happiness sadess all moments all emotions in the post just wonderful just wonderful

Aneesh said...

Wishing you the same buddy.
As your name says... Phoenix...its emerging, starting new from ashes..
So, hope for the best. life is full of surprises and its unpredictable.
Nice to hear that you got a lot of friends in here.. Keep posting..
'N exam results... Trust me. that's not the end of life, I've had enough experiences with exam results..LOL. But, you need to learn from mistakes. it is said "If you fall, don't see the place where you fell, but see the place where you slipped".
Have a wonderful year ahead!!
Keep dreaming
:)

Preetilata【ツ】 said...

sooner or later we realize nothing go waste..experience we do gain atleast.

this coming new year will be urs n sooner u will realize that 2008 ws also yours.

wish u a very happy new year. tc:)

Amrita~Ams said...

wow....how sweetly u pen down ur thoughts !
happy new yr :-)

hope so u ll hv wonderful tym ahead :)

Vijayshryaln said...

well done!!

little boxes said...

i start with a cliche..."tough times dont last,tough people do".
remember that great things always happen to great people.sooner or later.
keep the hope...
love ya

L. Venkata Subramaniam said...

Yup time to take stock....are you going to make resolutions for 2009? After Dasvidaniya I am more like into my lifetime list.

More rotten?? Hey some of us had a good year and are expecting even better next year.