Friday, February 25, 2011

Stray Thoughts

As I key in my thoughts the Volvo speeds away towards Pune. This is one of those times when I am traveling alone and I am simply loving it. My co passenger is a sweet tempered lady, having traveled so much over a period of time I really value my co-passengers who are really easy to get along with. Having horrid co-passengers can be a pain when traveling long distances and I am not unknown to that. 

As a child, I had always been apprehensive of traveling alone, half scared, of what?I am still not aware of. But of late, the unknown does not scare me anymore. But it really makes me feel nice. My first trip alone was when I had traveled from Hyderabad to Mumbai during Diwali. The other time was when I was traveling from Bangalore to Hyderabad and now to Pune. Each time I have to travel, my thoughts strays. To me, these journeys from one city to another, is a metaphor for the journey of life. We have destinations that we have to reach, we have fears and pain to overcome, for life to go on.  These journeys give me enough time with myself, to actually analyze what I am thinking, to rearrange it all to fight life with renewed energies. To me these journeys are therapeutic. 

As I type thoughts come thick and fast, I'm reminded of the dream I had last night. I dreamt of her, Roshni, my niece. There she was curled up to me, her face buried in my neck, like always. She murmured something about being scared of telling me to protect her and me trying to draw her close to me… the next thing I know I am lying on the floor in a pool of blood, my hands desperately feeling my lower tummy, the mound was gone, and I could hear my niece crying copiously. I woke up drenched in sweat; tears streaming down my face, I could almost see Roshni’s face swimming in front of me. I don’t know what my dream meant. But it was the first time in the past one year I had thought of her. Somehow I had always thought I had surgically removed her from me, that her existence didn’t really resonate with my soul anymore.  But I had dared to think I had my life in my control. Life has a way to telling you that no matter how much you try, there will always be things that are way beyond your control. 

Enough of gloomy thoughts for now, have a wonderful weekend people! I'm off to my nearest relatives’ and to some ghar ka khana… hope you guys have fun! More from my end but later…Ciao!

5 comments:

Sanjay Tripathi said...

I love to read whatever you write. Like always, this time too you have managed to put really abstract thoughts into meaningful text. Do continue writing. Like these long journeys taken alone, I believe writing too is immensely therapeutic. :)

Ria said...

Have fun dear n forget abt the dream....coz its just a dream. I loved traveling on my own too..in fact i have often felt like going to a random place on my own like say Goa or Leh/Ladakh, but my parents n hubby feel that its a crazy thing to do, so i've never really been able to do that.

Me said...

Everything is going to be fine.

Don't worry. Hugs.

The Silhouette said...

Hey, Hi
Sorry, i myself was traveling to distant lands...hehehe...
Hmm, interesting dream, i donno, i too ponder over such dreams,and then relate it to some equally weird incident that happens after months or years...
Traveling alone does help us to connect with ourselves...i love to travel alone...just to be nearer to myself...
Pune, hmmm...i dont remember the last time i visited Pune, its a visit long due...hmmm, do visit Mumbai if you get the time...its jus a hundred odd kms from there...

Take care,

Regards,
Eon Heath...

Preetilata【ツ】 said...

Hope all's well by now. at least better.