Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Beginning to an end... and another beginning?!!

Over the last couple of years I have tried to make this place what it used to be at one time. A happy place, a place to express my creativity, share my joys, express what I am going through. But somewhere down the line I have realized with time I have evolved, so has my life. I am not who I used to be. Most often I have found myself turning to this place time and again to write, to scribble; I could never really give up. Its been 6 years... and I keep finding my way back, I guess what I was actually doing was holding on to that part of me which was happy, sorted and a lot saner.

I am about to enter of the most life changing phases of my life. The impending darkness makes it hard to breathe but I knew it would be there all along.. I knew that this day will come so maybe that is why there was no surprise, the pain never got reflected in my expression, the way I carried myself or the things I did. I know this is where the real struggle in life begins, when I will watch people whom I have loved with my life walk away from me leaving behind a void...

The journey ahead will be dark, unhappy and marred with immense pain and if I can bring myself up to expressing, this place will probably the only place where I will confide my feelings. I dont expect you to be sympathetic, I dont expect you to read me, and I will be fine if you choose to distance yourself from the negativity. Goes without saying that I would appreciate if you are around, just there reading me, it would mean that I made sense to at least someone.... I wont answer questions as to what went wrong, I wont explain but I will be there... so make your exit while you still can... and if you choose to stay...I'd really value that..more than what words can say.

4 comments:

Rià said...

Would like to know more abt this new phase that u r talking abt...u can bb me if u want.

Phoenix said...

di...leave me ur email id...will mail you..i have changed my phone..not using a bb :( ..is there any other way we can connect?

Rià said...

You can mail me on raisadasatgmaildotcom

Ashwini Dodani said...

Good one, heart share!