Tuesday, September 04, 2012

Wake up when September ends!


Today is just one of those days when nothing is going right. Tolerance level is zero. I am swinging from highs to lows. Alternating between being hurt, angry, resigning to the pain or being just disillusioned. Damn you! September why do I lose so much when you come along!

Pain slices through me, I let you go bit by bit, tears brim but never slip out. Breathing becomes difficult, as I see you around knowing this is one of the last time.. very last time. I memorize your smile, the way your lips curl up. I read the pain in your eyes, I know you are looking for a sign that I am hurting too, no there wont be any for you to see. No there wont be another time. I keep telling myself, it will stop hurting as I walk on, I will myself to go on; breaking down comes so easy but I know that is not an option I have. Sometimes all I really want to do is to curl up and die, willing the end to come. No I dont do that, I know I have to do this, go through this, because there is no option left. Some more strength God!

This month always brings with it heartache galore... if I am losing you.. I am also questioning who I have become or who I will be when you are gone. While I am losing you.. I am accommodating people in my life once again.. so is it a sign? Or just a survival tactic?

Some tears will remain unshed till you leave.. because you truly deserve a grand farewell  for all the good times we have had...

"Smile because it happened..don't cry because the good times are over, I celebrate because those good times happened!"

3 comments:

Nikita Banerjee Bhagat said...

Good things always come to an end. It is going to be a while before you can think of this month as any other month! Hang in there buddy!

Phoenix said...

Thanks Nikita... your words mean much..

Ashwini Dodani said...

If it ends it wasn't the best, but sometimes we satisfy ourselves because at that moment that's the best for us! God Bless!